Suicidal thoughts - where to find help and how to respond

Suicidal thoughts - where to find help and how to respond

This article is for you if you're having suicidal thoughts. It's also for you if someone close to you has told you they want to die, and you don't know how to react. And it's for everyone who wants to know more - because knowledge on this topic can save a life.

If right now, at this moment, you're thinking about taking your own life - call the Trust Helpline: 116 123 (24/7) or the emergency number 112. You can also call us: 732 059 980. You are not alone. Help is available.

Suicidal thoughts - what do they really tell us?

Suicidal thoughts are far more common than is generally believed. Research indicates that as many as 10 percent of the population has experienced suicidal thoughts at some point in their lives. This is not a marginal number. These are millions of people - your neighbors, coworkers, friends. People who get up in the morning, go to work, pick up their children from school - and at the same time carry thoughts in their heads that they tell no one about.

There is a widespread, false belief that a person thinking about suicide "wants to die." This is an oversimplification. In the vast majority of cases, suicidal thoughts don't stem from a desire for death, but from a desire to end suffering. The difference is fundamental. A person in suicidal crisis doesn't want to get rid of life - they want to get rid of pain. And that means if the pain can be reduced, if another solution appears - the suicidal thoughts lose their power.

Risk factors

Suicidal thoughts can occur in anyone, but certain factors increase the risk:

• Depression and other mood disorders - depression is the strongest predictor of suicidal thoughts and attempts. But not the only one.
• Substance abuse - alcohol and drugs lower impulse control and intensify depressive states.
• Previous suicide attempts - each subsequent attempt increases the risk of the next.
• Loss - death of a loved one, breakup, job loss, loss of health.
• Social isolation - the feeling that no one cares.
• Chronic pain - both physical and emotional.
• Violence and trauma - experiences of domestic violence, sexual abuse, bullying.
• Feeling like a burden - the belief that loved ones would be better off without you.

The presence of these factors doesn't mean someone will attempt suicide. But it means they need particular attention and support.

How to recognize that someone may be thinking about suicide

Many people are afraid to ask directly: "Are you thinking about suicide?" There is a myth that asking about suicide "plants the idea." This is untrue - scientific research has unequivocally shown that asking about suicidal thoughts does not increase the risk. On the contrary - it gives the person in crisis a signal that someone sees their suffering and is willing to talk about it.

Signs that may indicate suicidal thoughts:

• Talking about death, about being a burden, about there being no point - "I wish I was never born," "It would be better if I wasn't here," "Soon you won't have to worry about me anymore"
• Withdrawing from relationships and activities that were previously important
• Giving away precious belongings, putting affairs in order - as if preparing to leave
• Sudden calm after a period of deep depression - which paradoxically may mean the person has made a decision and feels relief
• Seeking methods - reading about methods, stockpiling medication
• Increased consumption of alcohol or drugs
• Risk-taking behavior - driving drunk, seeking confrontation, neglecting health

How to respond when someone talks about suicide

When someone close to you tells you they're thinking about suicide - your reaction matters. Here's what to do:

Listen. Don't interrupt. Don't minimize. Don't say "you're overreacting," "others have it worse," "think about your family." These reactions shut down the conversation. A person who has mustered the courage to speak about suicidal thoughts needs to be heard - not lectured.

Ask directly. "Are you thinking about taking your own life?" It's a difficult question, but an important one. It provides clarity. If the answer is "yes" - keep asking: "Do you have a plan? Do you have access to means?" These questions help assess the level of danger.

Don't leave them alone. If the threat is immediate - stay with the person or make sure someone else is with them. Secure access to potentially dangerous items - medications, sharp objects. Call 112 or take the person to the emergency department of a hospital with a psychiatric ward.

Help them find help. Suggest calling the Trust Helpline (116 123) together or calling a psychologist. Help schedule an appointment. Drive them to the consultation. For a person in suicidal crisis, even finding a phone number and making a call can seem impossible - which is why your organizational help is invaluable.

What to do when you're the one having suicidal thoughts

If you're thinking about suicide - read this carefully:

What you feel is real. Your pain is genuine. No one has the right to minimize it. But suicidal thoughts are a symptom - not a solution. Your brain, overwhelmed by pain, is offering you the only solution it can see. But it's not the only solution. There are others - you just can't see them in a crisis.

Do one thing: tell someone. You don't have to explain everything. You don't need to have ready answers to the question "why?" It's enough to say: "I'm having suicidal thoughts and I need help." Tell your partner, a friend, your parents, your doctor. Or call: the Trust Helpline 116 123 (24/7), the Mental Health Crisis Support Center 800 70 2222, or the Sztuka Harmonii Psychological Center: 732 059 980.

Telling someone about suicidal thoughts isn't weakness. It's courage. And it's a step that can save your life.

Safety plan

A safety plan is a tool that helps people with suicidal thoughts get through crisis moments. It's best prepared with a psychologist or psychotherapist - but you can start on your own:

• Recognize your warning signs - thoughts, emotions, situations that intensify suicidal thoughts
• Write down coping strategies - things you can do on your own to reduce tension (a walk, breathing exercises, cold water on your face, music)
• Write down people you can call - names and phone numbers
• Write down crisis hotline numbers: 116 123, 800 70 2222, 112
• Secure your environment - give medications to someone, put away sharp objects, limit access to alcohol
• Write yourself a letter - remind yourself why life is worth living, what matters, who is waiting for you

Professional help

Suicidal thoughts require professional intervention. This is not something that will "pass on its own." Crisis intervention at the Sztuka Harmonii Psychological Center in Gdansk is designed for people in acute emotional crisis, including those with suicidal thoughts. The first session is a safe space to talk about what you're feeling - without judgment, without lecturing.

Magdalena Raba, MA and Aleksandra Ostrowska, MA conduct psychological consultations for people in crisis. After the first consultation, we jointly determine the next steps - this may be individual psychotherapy, a referral to a psychiatrist, or a combination of both forms of help.

If you're reading this article because you yourself are having suicidal thoughts - call. Now. 732 059 980. Or 116 123. Or 112. One phone call can change everything. You don't have to go through this alone.